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<\/p>\nEchoes fade and memories die: Autumn frosts have slain July. Still she haunts me, phantomwise, Alice moving under skies; Never seen by waking eyes. \u2013 Lewis Carroll<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
And, in the still dark of night, suddenly, I\u2019m awake again.\u00a0 First I roll one way, then the other.\u00a0 I\u2019m hot, then I\u2019m cold.\u00a0 I struggle to get comfortable, trying to relax my neck, and unfurl the tension in my hands and forearms.<\/p>\n
Eventually, I give up, and stare at the ceiling, flexing my toes back and forth.\u00a0 I listen, and hear the creak of wood, the whir of heat, and beyond that, the first birds beginning their busy chatter. Sighing, I reach for my kindle book.<\/p>\n
This has become something of a pattern for me. In my waking hours. I feel fine.\u00a0 I\u2019m not aware something terrible has befallen me, yet at night, I awaken suddenly, night after night.\u00a0 In my dreams, I am pursued by nameless specters.<\/p>\n
It is clear there is something on my mind, yet I feel powerless to name it, or attribute it to any one problem.\u00a0 Instead, stress is more a constant friend of mine. If I pay close attention, I notice her presence during the day also.\u00a0 I hang up after a conference call to find my jaw clenched, wondering how long it has been like that.<\/p>\n
Most of the time, I\u2019m too busy moving from one thing to another to even notice these subtleties. Rather my body needs to hit me over the head for me to wake up. I tell myself this is a positive thing.\u00a0 Being busy can be a cure for what ails, keeping me from overthinking.\u00a0 But there is such a thing as unthinking too. Searching for answers, I wonder how to unburden my mind, unraveling the complex inner-workings that mark our synapses, and dictate our feelings.<\/p>\n
I have a sense if I can understand, I can find a solution. However, the answer had better not be eliminating afternoon tea or evening wine.\u00a0 A parent has to have some vices in life, and both of these pair so nicely with chocolate.<\/p>\n
Just Breathe<\/u><\/p>\n
Do you ever notice if you tell yourself \u2018relax\u2019, nothing happens?\u00a0 If anything, the tightness seems to hold ever-fast.\u00a0 But, if you say, \u2018breathe\u2019, the effect is quite amazing.\u00a0 I can feel my chest expand, shoulders fall, and my pulse decline.\u00a0 Suddenly, it seems as if there is more space, in my lungs, and in my mind as well.\u00a0 That space allows for clarity, clearer thinking, and unbiased feeling. It is in this space, and stillness, that I can begin to sort through the things that mire.<\/p>\n
Ogres Have Layers<\/u><\/p>\n
Like ogres, and onions, the mind is multilayered. \u00a0While discerning an issue on the surface is quick, those beneath can fester.\u00a0 Sometimes I feel like the princess and the pea; I know I\u2019m not comfortable, but I can\u2019t find the source of my issue.\u00a0 This is when I need to peal it back, a layer at a time.\u00a0 If I start with a top of mind frustration, be it an event from the day, an exchange, an off-hand email, it seems to lead to something else. A few layers or lines down in my spider map, I reach the source, which often has little to do with that initial frustration.<\/p>\n
Distracted Driving<\/u><\/p>\n
Sometimes problems need time on their own.\u00a0\u00a0 When I feel truly uncertain, I turn to the comfort of a hobby.\u00a0 A few chapters in, or an hour or two spent in the garden are like communing with a good friend.\u00a0 Somewhere in the recesses of my mind, the problem starts to sort itself out, rather like a knotted necklace.<\/p>\n
Preemptive Pruning<\/u><\/p>\n
One year my roses flowered late into the season, and I worried about pruning until they were dormant to avoid stressing the plant.\u00a0 However, winter came that year with a sudden fury, so I couldn\u2019t prune until the growing season started again.\u00a0 By then, my roses were overgrown, and brittle from carrying too much bulk. Likewise, getting to a problem before it becomes too big is a rare talent, one that\u2019s often overlooked.\u00a0 Humans have such capacity to adapt, that we learn to live with situations that we can in fact change.\u00a0 Becoming more attuned \u00a0to notice the beginnings of a stressful situation is helpful in diffusing it before it flourishes.<\/p>\n
Observe to Understand<\/u><\/p>\n
Ever notice that sometimes people just want to be heard?\u00a0 Our tendency as friends and family is to help, to jump to problem solving, to make our loved one feel better.\u00a0 But oftentimes, all people want is for someone to listen, really listen.\u00a0 I think our minds are no different.\u00a0 It\u2019s easy to become distracted in our daily doings and goings on, such that we stop listening to what is on our hearts. In spending some time with ourselves, we can learn what we truly want.<\/p>\n
When I listen, I want not to ignore the voice in my head that pushs-back on a hated task. Maybe there\u2019s a way I can outsource this, and use my own time more productively.<\/p>\n
I want to understand which it is that keeps me up: is it my failings, or guilt over things I have done hastily?\u00a0\u00a0 I think these can equally can angst: a harsh word spat in anger, or the sparkling gem of goals left untouched.\u00a0\u00a0 But perhaps the two are linked.\u00a0 If I can find my way to avoid filling my calendar and my life with stuff and to-dos, I won\u2019t be so rushed, or need to rush my kids so.\u00a0 So to, would there be time to dream a little dream, not allowing my ambitions to grow dusty.<\/p>\n
July may be gone, with the first stirrings of winter on the way.\u00a0 The holiday season brings busy tidings of good cheer, but gratefully, I realize, the nights are long, and cold and black, and in this lies peace.<\/p>\n
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<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Echoes fade and memories die: Autumn frosts have slain July. Still she haunts me, phantomwise, Alice moving under skies; Never seen by waking eyes. \u2013 Lewis Carroll And, in the still dark of night, suddenly, I\u2019m awake again.\u00a0 First I roll one way, then the other.\u00a0 I\u2019m hot, then I\u2019m cold.\u00a0 I struggle to get… Continue reading Chicken Soup for the Soul, and Calisthenics for the Mind<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-209","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-posts"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p78aL7-3n","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lynnricker.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/209","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lynnricker.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lynnricker.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lynnricker.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lynnricker.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=209"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/lynnricker.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/209\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":213,"href":"https:\/\/lynnricker.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/209\/revisions\/213"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lynnricker.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=209"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lynnricker.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=209"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lynnricker.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=209"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}